Hey everybody! The past week has been pretty good for me, I've been learning to use Instagram for the first time and now have a page Our.Pale.Days. I'm posting as often as I can so while I delve into my past here, my present life will be documented there until my story catches up to itself. Please add me if you are interested in my tale of Bean and Passenger.
Now I'll continue Bean's story..
At the beginning of December we arranged to go up North to visit my parents for an early Christmas, we were both looking forward to seeing the family and I was happy my fatigue and achey boobs had eased off considerably.
It was the Friday before we went to see my parents, I was at home waiting for Rob to come home from work. I went to the loo and saw brown discharge on the toilet tissue after wiping. I remember a wave of terror run through me like pins and needles. There wasn't very much on the tissue and nothing in my knickers but I rang Rob straight away and he suggested ringing NHS 111 - a free 24hour number patients can ring for advice on symptoms that are not serious enough for A&E. The man on the phone was pretty good, he asked me if I had had any pain and whether any of the blood was red rather than brown. I'd had no other symptoms and he referred me to a doctor who rang me back within an hour or so who asked me the same questions again. There had been no change in my symptoms and no more blood was seen. She said it wasn't uncommon to see dark blood during the first trimester of pregnancy but to take thing easy for the next few days. She also said not to travel, which admittedly I ignored as we were due to visit my family 5hours away by car the next day. I figured As Rob always does the driving all I would be doing is sitting in the car and what difference is that to sitting at home on the sofa?
My anxiety continued to rise when Rob came home that evening and I cried and I was scared and frightened. I researched extensively what brown blood in first trimester meant. Although it came up with the word miscarriage it also associated it with abdominal pain and bright red blood and heavy bleeding all of which I didn't have at all.
The next morning we travelled to my parents and actually had a great early Christmas. We didn't mention the brown spotting and I remained on the plan of not eating soft cheese or drinking.
On the Sunday we set off home again, we'd managed a pretty good run and hadn't even had a break on the 5 hour drive. During a 40mph stretch along the motorway the car overtaking us momentarily distracted Rob with his lights in the wing mirror as he passed. The car in front of us broke suddenly and I shouted, Rob broke as hard as he could but there wasn't enough room and we hit the car in front at around 25-30mph. No damage was made to either drivers or passengers and the cars didn't suffer much but I instantly thought of Bean. I had no pain but I rang 111 again and explained the situation. They suggested that we go to A&E to be checked over.
We waited around 3 hours in Warwick A&E before I was seen, again I had no pain during that time or bleeding or any sort. They did a pregnancy test which came back positive and booked me in for an early scan the next day. Needless to say that night was an anxious and sleepless one but I was hopeful, Bean was safely nestled deep in my pelvis as I was only around 8 weeks, I'd had no pain and no bleeding. I tried to keep calm and I didn't want to upset Bean by being stressed.
At the time I thought I was stressed out and anxious but knowing what I know now, I had no idea what stress was then and I was very naive. Even though we knew of the first 12 weeks being the danger zone of pregnancy it was only a little seed of doubt in my mind and I never really thought anything was wrong, after all we were two young healthy individuals who had only taken 3 months to conceive.
So we went along to the early scan at Warwick hospital (a little way from Oxfordshire where we rented a little place). As we waited I saw the anxious faces around us, a couple in particular really stick in my mind. I young woman and I guess to be her boyfriend or husband came out of the scanning room, their faces were grave and I overheard the girl say "I knew it, I knew it." The partner didn't say anything as he carried her coat and bag. It was obvious they'd been given bad news and a relayed it to Rob with a look. They sat back into the waiting area which struck me as odd at the time but I guess they were to go into another room to be given their options. I was extremely sorry to see that couple and felt awful for them but it didn't phase me in terms of Bean and our pregnancy, Bean was fine, I'd had no pain, the crash was very minor and the only concern was the brown spotting from Friday which had not occurred since.
I'll leave it there for this week, I'm trying to keep my word count down per post but if you think it's too long or short please let me know and I'll change the count accordingly.
Hope you have a great week and remember to follow our.pale.days on instagram!
Lots of love, Adele xxx
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